An Open Letter To The Teenage Girl

Dear Teenage girl,

As a teenage girl, you will face many challenges that can either make or break you. Someday, you will understand that these years contributed to turning you into a self-assured and responsible young adult.

Anxiety

Every child has stressful situations to cope with, including arguments with friends, bullying, and disputes with parents. However, many are also struggling with huge exam pressures and stress right now, and when the exam stress ends, the stress of waiting for results begins’

Dr van Zwanenberg 

Lets start by discussing irrational thoughts and anxiety caused by fear of not passing exams. The pressure always amps up when exam period comes around.

Here are some of the extra things you can do when you feel anxious:

  • Keep a journal to list all your thoughts and emotions.
  • Talk to a trusted adult who can give you advice on how to deal with anxiety.
  • Take notes of all the things you are doing to combat the issue that is causing the anxiety.

Lastly, it is important to understand if you don’t get the results you want, you can still have a bright future.

Here is a list of famous successful people who didn’t get the best grades but still managed to make a name for themselves:

  • Sarah Millican, failed her A-levels and is now a successful comedian.
  • Jeremy Clarkson, an English broadcaster tweeted, ‘If your A-level results aren’t joyous, take comfort from the fact I got a C and two Us. And I have a Mercedes Benz.’
  • Lord Alan Suger only has 1 GCSE and he is worth about £1.4 billion.

Puberty and body issues

One in three UK teenagers are ‘ashamed of their body’

The Guardian

Too tall. Too short. Too fat. Too skinny.

Do you know that the negative thoughts you have about yourself have been caused by what you have seen in society? In the likes of TV adverts, social media, billboards.

The standard of beauty is set by the masses – and the end result is what we see glorified on several platforms. When you don’t see a representation of your body type it makes you think something is wrong with you – but that is not true. You are perfect just the way you are.

Every decade or so the standard of beauty changes and who is to say when your body type will be seen as desirable. So why bother trying to please the masses, they are so fickle anyway.

What’s more, during puberty your body is still changing. That means that the body you have today is not the body you will have as an adult. Yes, that’s right your body will keep changing over the years. That is why, anything you do to change your weight should be founded on health rather than beauty.

Practical ways you can appreciate your body type as it is:

  • Dress for your body type – learn what style of clothes you can wear to suit your body shape. 
  • Tell yourself that you are beautiful just the way you are.
  • If you don’t believe that you are, search for your favourite feature and focus on that.

Friends and relationships

I hate to burst your bubble but some of the friends you have now won’t even be on your phone contact list in ten years time. With that being said, enjoy your friendships while they last. Some friendships are but for a season, only a few will last for a lifetime. You will know when you have a lifetime friendship.

Never do a wrong thing to make a friend or to keep one

Robert E. Lee

Don’t let anyone persuade you to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with. Know exactly what you stand for and make it clear from the start of a blossoming friendship . Treasure the friends who encourage and tell you the truth.

Watch out for your strong friends

Strong people are not as strong as you think. What makes someone strong? Don’t they have to go through hardships to earn that title? Who is going to support them? That’s where you come in.

Check up on your strong friend. They’re usually the one bleeding in silence.

Maverick

You know that friend who is always happy and doesn’t seem to have a care in the world? Call them up. Check on them regularly and don’t just call them to make you laugh. Ask them what is really going on in their life. Some people are very good at masking their pain to everyone.

Mean Girls

Yeah, the mean girls are everywhere and their words can cut deep – but only if you allow them to.

I think the hardest part about being a teenager is dealing with other teenagers – the criticism and the ridicule, the gossip and rumours.

Beverley Mitchell

What you need to remember is that someone who is hurt may also hurt others. Some of these girls are going through a tough time at home and want to take out their frustration on others. They want to get a rise out of making people feel as bad as they do. So don’t let them get to you.

Parents

I know it can be hard to imagine that your parents were once teenagers too. Right now, they may seem so hard to relate to. But the truth is they were once like you and probably went through similar things. So, give them a chance – they might have practical advice that will help you get through a bad day.

If you still don’t feel comfortable talking to your parents – pick an older relative such as an aunt or an older sister to confide in.

Money

Money doesn’t grow on trees, and you will learn that soon. While you don’t need to worry about bills and can rely on the bank of mum and dad, enjoy it! Save those coins, and don’t hurry to grow up because adulting is so over-rated.

Prayer

Nothing is more powerful than prayer. I need you to understand that it really isn’t as hard as you think. Sometimes you may feel so sad and alone because of a situation beyond your control. What if I told you that nobody understands you more than God? God can also control things beyond human capacity. So speak to him about all your fears. Tell him exactly how you feel. He is always listening.

Here are some tips for talking to God for the first time.

  • Go to a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed and speak to God. 
  • Imagine if God is your silent friend that is nodding along to every word you are saying.
  • If you can’t imagine speaking to him, then write letters to him instead.

You are going to be okay

“Life gives you plenty of time to do whatever you want to do if you stay in the present moment.”

Deepak Chopra

What if I told you that you would look back at this time as the most pivotal years of your life. One day, you think about how panicked you were about a situation you really didn’t need to worry about.

Exams. Friends, Relationships. They all come and go. The truth is you will live to tell the story. So don’t be too hard on yourself and take everything as a lesson you need to learn to get you through to the next stage of life.

6 thoughts on “An Open Letter To The Teenage Girl

  1. Great insight for the teens. I love the emphasis on prayer. I can learn from that at my big age of 25.

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