Today marks twenty years since my mother passed away. I will use the time to share some of the fond memories I have about her.
Here are some facts about my mum that make me smile.
- My mum enjoyed reading books. Sometimes we would read together and share our thoughts about the plot and characters. She also used to share Yoruba stories that her mother had shared with her as a kid.
- My mother’s emotional intelligence carried a lot of weight. Her presence filled the house with extra warmth and love.
- My mother was a primary school teacher before she got married and had kids. She used her knowledge to play a vital part in our education. This included helping us with our school work. For example, when I was struggling to learn the times tables, she bought me a sing-along tape to listen to. She realised that there were different learning styles and took the time to learn about mine.
- My mum loved taking us to the local library to borrow books, and we thoroughly enjoyed those trips. I still enjoy going to the local library to borrow books and getting involved with local community events.
- My mum was a compassionate and caring friend. When any of her friends had an issue, she was right there with them, talking to them and praying along with them until the problem was solved.
- My mum was a real prayer warrior. I remember one lady would come to our house every week and together with my mum they would sing who hymns and pray together.
- My mum had a subscription for World Books; every few months, they would send some new books, and that’s how our home library grew.
- My mum loved gardening. She wanted to grow plants and food. Once we had access to a garden, she had plans to really grow a lot of things and even bought large plant pots.
- My mum was family-oriented. Even though she lived thousands of miles away from her siblings and parents, she still wrote letters to them and called them often to keep up with the events of their lives.
- My mum loved baking – she would make bread, cake and a lot of other baked goods. She also made the best puff puff ( a Nigerian delicacy, a little like doughnuts).
Below is something I wrote a few months ago about the many things my mum told us about her life:
My dear child,
you may think I left too soon,
that I didn't get to really live,
but my dear I have lived,
even before your time I really lived,
Remember I told you how,
I lived among my siblings,
As a child I remember how my dad would chase my mum around the house and they'll play together as children,
Yes. I witnessed love in my childhood home,
Remember I told you that I used to,
go with my mother to assist women giving birth,
I saw and observed many things,
and stored it for later use,
Remember I told you about,
Growing up in post colonial Nigeria,
Through the sixties even to the eighties,
How I was too short to go to school,
Under the right hand must touch left ear rule,
Until I protested and they eventually let me go,
how much I loved learning and excelling at school,
How we would wake up early to walk to school,
and while walking to school, I rested my eyes I used my ears to sense impending danger
You may recall,
how I told you about a time,
I trained as a teacher under British educators,
how one of the British women I lived with taught me so much,
that's why my belief then was that all British people were as kind as her,
Then upon reaching UK I held that belief,
Only for it to be shattered after dealing with grumpy people,
One morning I greeted one neighbour, "good morning"
And his response was "what's good about it"
I also told you about a time,
I sat on a bus and a man,
Who sat beside me,
Tried to steal the money in my pocket,
I told you how I pinched his hand,
Yet he couldn't cry out,
Otherwise the whole bus would call him a thief and it will go from bad to worse. That day that man learned never to attempt such a thing again.
My dear can you see,
That my life was quite eventful indeed,
So while you think I didn't experience much,
I hope you realise that I had a very fulfilling life,
Perhaps now you can see that,
settling down in a house full of children,
was only a short part of my life,
compared to the earlier parts,
So my dear can you now see
That I really lived,
As much as I could, I lived.
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Ibs Writes 